Distorted Humor

American bred Thoroughbred racehorse

Distorted Humor (foaled March 19, 1993 in Kentucky) is an American Thoroughbred racehorse and a successful sire.

Distorted Humor's sire is Forty Niner, 1987's Eclipse Award winning Outstanding Two Year Old Male Horse by the champion sire, Mr. Prospector. Distorted Humor's dam was Danzig's Beauty by Danzig. Distorted Humor was her second foal. (Danzig's Beauty died June 17, 2006, at the age of 19 due to colic. She'd given birth in April 2006, to her last foal, a filly by Empire Maker. Of her eight starters, six were winners.)

Distorted Humor himself had a career running middle distance stakes races. He broke his maiden at Florida's Gulfstream Park and was initially trained by Phil Gleaves as a sprinter/miler. Elliott Walden took over training duties in the spring of 1996 after Prestonwood Farm purchased a half interest in Distorted Humor. Distorted Humor's career race record was 8 wins, 5 places and 3 shows in 23 starts, with earnings of $769,964. As a three year old, he won the Screen King Stakes, was second in the Grade III Fayette Stakes and the Grade II Jerome Handicap, and finished 3rd in the Grade III King's Bishop Stakes. At four, he took the Grade III Salvator Mile Handicap, and was second in the Grade III Kentucky Cup Classic Stakes and the Grade III Philip H. Iselin Handicap. At five, he took the Grade II Commonwealth Breeders' Cup Stakes (setting the record for the distance that still holds), the Grade II Churchill Downs Stakes, and the Grade III Ack Ack Handicap before he was retired. At maturity, he reached .

Beginning in 1999, Distorted Humor stood twice in Victoria, Australia, (at Grand Lodge Stud in Avenel) for $12,000. He sired two Australian crops. In those crops, 93 foals were runners, 74 were winners, 12 placed, and two others have come in the money. His get include Rinky Dink: winner of the South Australian Oaks and the Tasmanian Oaks, Distorted Halo: winner of the Moonee Valley and Mercedes Benz Hong Kong Derby Trial, and Tirade: winner of the Caulfield Guineas Prelude and third in VRC Ascot Vale Stakes. Among his Australian winners are both flat runners and jumpers. One jumper, four year old Some Are Bent, took the Moonee Valley Hurdle in July 2006, his third jumps win in his past four outings. Back in the United States, Distorted Humor's 2000 fee remained low and his mares average, yet he became America's leading freshman sire of 2002. In 2003, his son Funny Cide became a dual classic winner, and Awesome Humor was a Grade I winner. In 2005, Distorted Humor's oldest foals were five year olds. Over the course of 140 races, 88 of his get (13 of which were two year olds) earned $8.6 million. He finished the year as the second top sire in America, beaten only by the now deceased Saint Ballado. By late 2006, he had 255 winners, including 18 graded stakes winners, from 340 starters and sired 46 stakes winners. From five crops, his progeny have earned $30,265,433. In 2006, as a 14 year old sire, he had 20 different horses win a combined 31 stakes races, 10 of which were graded. At age 15 (2008), Distorted Humor produced at least 20 stakes winners for the second year in a row. For the third straight year, he ranked among the top six stallions by progeny earnings. For 2007, he ranked third behind Smart Strike (sire of Curlin and English Channel) and A. P. Indy. 2011 was his best year yet as he earned the title of Leading sire in North America, thanks in part to Belmont Stakes winner Drosselmeyer. "Distorted Humor's progeny inherit the will to win, the desire; a lot like Storm Cat," said WinStar Farm President and CEO Doug Cauthen. "They're always battling. They battle and win or try to win, and that desire tends to get them in the winner's circle."

Distorted Humor's fee for 2008 was $300,000—the same fee commanded by A. P. Indy and Storm Cat. Due to the uncertain financial climate beginning in 2008, his fee was reduced to $225,000 for 2009 and $100,000 for 2011. In 2017 his fee was listed by WinStar and Bloodhorse. com as $80,000. In 2021 his retirement from stud duty was announced.