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Monty Python sketch

Infobox
|name = Argument Clinic
|title = Argument Clinic
|image =
|caption = Cleese and Palin performing the sketch live in 2014
|headerstyle = background:#ccf;
|labelstyle = background:#ddf;
|label1 = Writers
|data1 = John CleeseGraham Chapman
|label2 = Actors
|data2 = Michael PalinJohn CleeseGraham ChapmanEric IdleTerry JonesRita DaviesCarol ClevelandDawn FrenchChris Langham
|label3 = First appearance
|data3 = "The Money Programme" (2 November 1972)

The sketch parodies modern consumer culture, implying that anything can be purchased, even absurd things such as arguing, abuse, or being hit over the head. The sketch was typical for Cleese's and Chapman's writing at the time, as it relied on verbal comedy. Python author Darl Larsen believes the sketch was influenced by music hall and radio comedy, particularly that of the Goons, and notes that there is little camera movement during the original television recording. One line in the middle of the sketch, "An argument is a connected series of statements intended to establish a definite proposition" was taken almost verbatim from the Oxford English Dictionary.

The sketch originally appeared in the 29th episode of the original television series, entitled "The Money Programme", and was released (in audio only) on the LP Monty Python's Previous Record, on Charisma Records in 1972. The sketch was subsequently performed live at the Hollywood Bowl in September 1980, which was filmed and released as Monty Python Live at the Hollywood Bowl. The sketch features the discussion with the receptionist (played here by Carol Cleveland), the abuse from Chapman, and most of the argument between Cleese and Palin. It is then ended abruptly by the entrance of Terry Gilliam, on wires, singing "I've Got Two Legs". A further live performance occurred in 1989 at the Secret Policeman's Ball, where Cleveland's and Chapman's roles were replaced by Dawn French and Chris Langham. This performance was subsequently released on DVD. The sketch was performed again in July 2014 during Monty Python Live (Mostly), with Terry Jones filling in for Chapman's role and Gilliam reprising "I've Got Two Legs".

The sketch has been frequently used as an example of how not to argue, because, as Palin's character notes, it contains little more than ad hominem attacks and contradiction, and does not contribute to critical thinking. It has also been described as a "classical case in point" of dialogue where two parties are unwilling to co operate, and as an example of flawed logic, since Palin is attempting to argue that Cleese is not arguing with him. The text of the argument has been presented as a good example of the workings of English grammar, where sentences can be reduced to simple subject/verb pairs. It has been included as an example of analysing English in school textbooks. The sketch has become popular with philosophy students, who note that arguing is "all we are good at", and wonder about the intellectual exercise one could get from paying for a professional quality debate. The Python programming language, which contains many Monty Python references as feature names, has an internal only module called "Argument Clinic" to pre process Python files. The sketch is referenced in a line of dialogue in the TV show House, season 6, episode 10, 'Wilson'. The character Dr. Wilson says to Dr. House "I didn't come here for an argument", to which House replies "No, right, that's room 12A", echoing the lines from the 'abuse room' in the Argument Clinic sketch.